Ivybelle, While I was away

Why was I away.Hello everyone, sorry I was gone for so long.

A lot of things have been happening lately and I’m going to try my best to explain it all.

A few months ago I fell in a big hole. I was really depressed and I felt very overwhelmed. I wasn’t talking to anyone and it was really hard just to get up in the morning. I didn’t want to deal with anyone or socialize.

At the end of November I got bad news about a man who I considered a father and he passed away. I hadn’t seen him in months and one day right after work I got a call saying that he was in the hospital. I was heart-broken and texted my best friend right away. A couple weeks went by and he passed away the day after I visited him.

I didn’t cry, I wasn’t angry, I wasn’t happy, I just didn’t completely understand what was going on.

In the middle of December I found out an old friend/ex boyfriend of mine passed away from a shooting. He was brought to the hospital and didn’t make it. I haven’t seen him in years but I promised myself I would visit him one day to talk and hang out but I haven’t gotten that chance. He was only 26 years old, had a whole life ahead of him and one situation turned wrong and that was the end of it.

Everything took a toll and I’m still trying to understand “why”.

I cried, I was angry, I blamed myself and felt guilt but today I got back on my feet and I have the motivation to write again.

I was able to talk to a dear friend, and when I was ready, explain why I left the way I did. I’m sorry I was away for so long, but I needed a break to get myself together.

Stay Strong, Stay Beautiful, Stay Positive.



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