Lynn self care part 2

So this subject honestly could and couldn’t have come up at a better time. A couple months ago, I got my first job. I’m now working in a kitchen at a fast food joint in a mall food court. It gets stressful and I’ve broken down almost every day since I’ve started. Since that’s a pretty bad thing to happen on the clock, I’ve been trying to find ways to improve my mental health. I’ll be talking about how I handle my self care, so if it isn’t what you’re looking for or it doesn’t work for you, I’m sorry and I hope you find something that does.

Taking the little things life has to offer has kept me going for years now and honestly some of these things really help lift attitudes, both mine and other peoples, even if it’s just by a small amount. Putting on a clean pair of pants seems to work well, even if you’re not planning on going anywhere. Not sure why it helps, but it does. Taking a shower and getting yourself cleaned up works too. Heck, go all out and give yourself a pampering day!

Getting yourself out of the house on free days works too, even for just grabbing a snack or a drink but sometimes you just need a day indoors and that’s fine too. Just make sure to let people around you know what’s going on if and before you close yourself off. I’ve been pretty guilty of that lately with TIME actually and I feel super bad about that. Thinking is all well and good too, but just be sure not to overthink things and dwell until you’ve drained yourself even more. Make sure to have some fun and keep yourself preoccupied.

If all else fails and this problem seems to be out of your hands, you might want to seek professional help, like a therapist. Don’t worry, it’s been suggested to me a few times too and I’m told there are some that are there solely for people with low income. I have yet to find any myself, but I trust that there are.

I hope you guys find a method of self care that works for you! Remember, you have your whole life ahead of you!

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Marie Talks: Self-care

Self-care is highly important for your mental health and all around wellness. It can help with calming you down,  refreshing your mind,  and re-energize your mind and body.

What is Self-care?
“Self care is care provided “for you, by you.” It’s about identifying your own needs and taking steps to meet them. It is taking the time to do some of the activities that nurture you. Self care is about taking proper care of yourself and treating yourself as kindly as you treat others.”

Why is Self-Care Important?
Self-care is important because our mind and body does not function well  when we are stressing out, busy, overwhelming our schedules and/or not making time for ourselves. We all deserve a chance to sit back, take a breath and stop worrying or planning in our minds. Without our minds having the breaks it needs/deserves we stop being able to think properly. We can lose the ability to see all of our options, feel refreshed and cope well with stress.

Remember it’s OK to put yourself first, even if only once in a while.

So as a group we all had a challenge for ourselves, to do something for ourselves and recuperate. I look forward to talking to you more about self-care next week and sharing with you what I did for myself.

What do you do for self-care? I’d love to hear from you.

Stay Beautiful Lovies,
Marie Olsson xx

Sources:

Self Care for Women: Fact Sheet What Is Self Care? (2009): n. pag. Web. <http://www.fgwrc.ca/uploads/ck/files/Resources/Factsheets/FactSheetSelfCare.pdf&gt;.

Howie Defranco on Self Care Part 1

Hey blog readers it’s Howie Defranco and today we’re going to discuss the all too important concept of self care. Self care is basically looking after you, your needs and nurturing them, which we all need to do to keep ourselves sane. I mean if all you ever do in life is for someone else, then even if out of love your life is their life not your own. Something to think about for all you altruistic do gooders out there who never think about your own needs. I’m completely calling myself out with that line but I do try to maintain a certain level of self care to but will get to that later. For this is about self care as a whole.
Now all those of you reading this I want you to get in a comfortable position, breathe deep and think of the greatest moment in your life. Then hold that feeling, feel the warmth it brings into your soul and then do it every time you get mad or upset or lose your confidence. Heal yourself with the strength of your memories, it’s an easy form of self care just to choose to remember the good times, to feel that emotion again. Then go find a book, a movie, a song you love and read it, watch it, listen to it and feel good about who you are. For self care is about taking care of who you are and that should matter most to you.

Ivybelle Opinion Piece on Self Harm

Self-Harm is a very touchy subject to a lot of people. It has been around for years and yet people don’t really understand why people do it or don’t really understand that there is more than one type of self-harm. There’s mutilation, burning, too much food or not enough, there’s drugs/alcohol, there’s lack of sleep or too much, and many more. A person doesn’t always realize what they do to themselves. People who starve themselves or have lack of sleep don’t realize that they are harming themselves because they think it’s a normal thing and that it doesn’t hurt their body.

The first thing people thing a person will think when mentioning “Self-Harm” is cutting or burning themselves. Self-Harm can not only be caused by a mental issue but also from bullying, harassment, Abuse, etc.. It can really push someone into harming themselves. Self-Harm is something that I know very well. I myself have struggled with it for years, mine was a combined of different harms including; mutilation, lack of sleep, lack of food and at some point I wanted to turn to burning myself. Not a lot of people knew because I didn’t want anyone to know. I was scared that they would tell my mom or they would make fun of me or send me into a hospital.

The first time I ever tried self-harm I was 10. When I was 10 years old, I got bullied really badly. I got called every name in the book, physically abused, people made fun of me because my mom was deaf and a girl started a petition of who wanted me dead. Eventually I started starving myself. Not only because I was being called ugly and fat, but because my mom was poor and couldn’t always afford to buy food. I stopped eating and I was afraid to tell anyone about the situations I was going through.

In gym class one day I blacked out and the gym teachers didn’t do anything. I thought to myself maybe no one actually cares about me after all. At that moment I didn’t really want to live anymore. With the years I just got the habit of starving myself without realizing that I was actually self-harming myself. I thought it was normal I didn’t think I was harming myself. When I was younger, sleep was not something that I would allow myself at times. The abuse I went through since I was 5 caused me to be paranoid and cause a serious trauma. I would stay awake for weeks and I would start having physical pain. Like cramps, headaches, my eyes would hurt, I was emotionally drained and eventually it didn’t matter anymore because I allowed my body to suffer because of my fear. With time, I didn’t have to force myself to stay up anymore and I wouldn’t get any physical pain because I got used to it. I didn’t realize the damage I was causing to my body.

In high school I was finally told by an old friend told me that cutting was a way for her to release pain and it felt good. I tried it and that’s what I turned to… I did it for many reasons. One of them was to focus my pain physically and forget the pain emotionally. I hated the feeling of pain. So instead I would focus on the physical pain because it was only temporary. Another reason as well, was because I felt ugly. I was bullied for years and people would always call me ugly, fat, useless, they said that nobody loved me even my mom. Eventually I believe it. Self-Harm was a way for me to express how I felt on the inside to match the outside. Another reason was that I became addicted to the pain. The pain felt good, It made me feel alive again.

When go through a lot of emotional pain and bottle it up, you eventually become numb. It’s like it becomes too much mentally and emotionally and you forget that you are even alive because eventually you don’t feel the pain of cutting or burning or any other type of self-harm. After cutting wasn’t enough for me, I wanted so badly to try burning myself. I came close to doing it until I got caught by a friend and gave me a speech about how self-harm wasn’t the way to deal with situations. At that point, bullying wasn’t the only problem. There was family issues as well. But then I thought to myself maybe I should just stick to cutting along with the other things I was doing to myself. See, even though people tell you to not harm yourself, it’s something that is not easy to stop.

Often you think to yourself that no one understands your pain, that they don’t really care about you, that they say it out of pity or that they would feel responsible if something happened to you. You think that you are alone, that you will never get through your problems that the easiest way to deal with it is self-harm to the point that you kill yourself or even become numb. Sometimes you would like to wear a t-shirt or shorts but you can’t because you don’t want people to judge you on the battle wounds you have or you feel too ugly because of the scars, yet you can’t seem to stop. It’s a way to relief yourself, a “home”, an addiction, your therapy.

A lot of people won’t understand why you do it. And really, it’s not something that’s easy to explain unless you go through it. Often people who self-harm are being called weak, stupid and even “useless”. I’ve heard that one many times,but it’s not. People who self-harm are a lot stronger than people think. They go through a lot and don’t know how to deal with it. It’s so easy to be judged. Not everyone has the courage to take a blade, knife, razor, etc… To their skin without thinking without crying and doing it over and over again.

Often people tells us that we are attention-whores, or we are a sad excuse. Sometimes were are just looking for people to pity us. That would wouldn’t be harming ourselves if we really wanted to end ourselves. However sometimes, people who starve/over eat, use drugs/alcohol, etc… Don’t realize they are harming themselves, so how can they be looking for attention- not everyone has money to get therapy. A lot of doctors would say that you need medication or therapy, but honestly, we don’t need therapy or medication to make us feel crazy. We need someone to give us a hug and tell us we will be okay and that we aren’t crazy. We need a true friend who won’t betray us, and no one wants to be a medication because they just think we are crazy and that medication will make people stop harming themselves.

Self-harm is a very vulnerable thing to admit and to talk about. Schools don’t really talk about it anymore. People choose to close their eyes instead of getting them some help. More and more people are turning to those releases because it’s the only thing that can make them feel free in a way. Today’s society is making us more and more depressed because of the standards or being “beautiful“ or  making us so stressed out that we feel like there is no way out. Today, I still struggling with self-harm. I’ve stopped for a couple years and every day is another day that I am struggling to not get into it again. It’s not easy. When I see a knife, the temptation is there. There’s morning and lunches that I skip eating and there are days that I force myself to stay up. It’s a battle that I keep fighting but I tell myself that I have to stay strong.

So remember people, stay strong. You are beautiful and it does get better. Don’t be afraid to get help. You are not crazy, you are just going through pain that is overwhelming and hard to deal with. You will get through it. Stay strong. Stay Beautiful. – Ivybelle – Xx